Coming out is taking a risk, a risk of showing who you really are to your nearest and dearest and hoping that it does not change how they feel about you.
You must examine your reasons for coming out as a lesbian. Closely examine why you want to come out as a lesbian now and make certain in your mind that the only reason is you and your happiness
You must be ready to accept that not all of your loved ones are OK with you being a lesbian. And if they aren't, it's ok. It will hurt for a while but at least you know that the friends that stay with you love you for who you are, lesbian or not. You will be met with a spectrum of reactions and often they are not the reactions you expect. Some will be shocked, some not really bothered, some will be angry, others supportive. Whatever their response, you need to allow them the express themselves and accept their response.
If you are still a young person, coming out as a lesbian to your parents can be particularly difficult. While most parents are supportive, do not be surprised if their reaction is shame or guilt or anger or even denial [Denial can result in you coming out to them over and over and over and it can be really tiresome but you may have to do this]
You must identify your nearest and dearest and come out to them first, whatever you think their response might be. Your parents, husband, boyfriend, children, best friend, business partner.
Come out to the people who are closest to you individually. Coming out as a lesbian is a very intimate thing. It just is not something you do at the dinner table or in the office board room. You have unique relationships with each and everyone of your close friends and family, so respect it. Give them a chance to absorb and react to the news you are sharing privately
You must always give them a chance to respond to your news and be available to answer questions. Do not get angry at their questions. Try to patiently and gently help them understand what it is you are telling them
Understand in yourself and help your loved ones understand that coming out as a lesbian does not change who you are.
Do it personally where possible, not over the phone or by text message or an email.
Identify an ally and tell them first. You will need them to talk to later, or their shoulder to cry on.
Do not come out as a lesbian on an impulse, or when you are drunk. Remember once you are out, you cannot successfully climb back into the closet.
Always remember through this whole process to be proud of who you are!
